“New Normal”. It’s what I had to find when I lost my leg a little over 3 1/2 years ago. It’s not easy quest when it comes to life and your routines. It’s never black and white. It’s always in color. Lots of color. It takes a lot of trial and errors till eventually one day you look back and realize that you’re living a great life despite the fact you are down a limb. “New Normal” comes without you even knowing it. Yes, you know your life is different and life must be adjusted to this new thing but it practically comes when you weren’t even expecting it. It comes when you are so busy trying to figure out the next thing that you don’t even realize all the stuff you started doing with ease. It’s like brushing your hair. You definitely have a few knots to get out and some are bigger and hold you up more than others. But once you make it through, and all the knots are out, it is smooth stroke of happiness. Of relief. Finding that “New Normal” for yourself is never easy but it’s something you 100% have to do. It’s what you must do to live and not just survive. And we all know how important that is to me. But “New Normal” to the ones around you is a touch different.

I’m so very lucky that my son was so very young when I lost my leg. Though it was the toughest part of the whole situation because I came home to a son who’s life went from “so normal” to “no normal” in just a days time. Who went from playing at the babysitter for 8 hours a day to hanging with mom in the evening and night originally, to hanging at the babysitter from sun up to sun down, bouncing around from grandmas house to aunts house and then back home to dad after dark. His “no normal” became “normal” to him. He wasn’t quite sure where he was going next but was always happy to see the next person. But the real hard part for me and him came when I first came home. He didn’t know who I was. I mean he was 10 months when I left and was just a week shy of being one when I came back. Now he’s in a house with a lady who can only hold him with help, can not get on the floor and play with him, and expected him to call her “mom”. His “normal” had changed again. But this time he had to do some adapting. Before it was my family who had to make adjustments and schedules to make sure someone could always have my son while my husband was with me at the hospital. But now he’s the one who had to adapt to his mom not being able to do pretty much anything at first. And this broke my heart. And that is why I did everything in my power to work on my capabilities. I started with small things like baking his first birthday cake. Then I tried something a little bigger like sliding gently off my chair to get on the floor to play with him. And then again to something bigger yet like watching my son for a couple hours so my husband could feed or giving my son a bath. I was so overwhelmed with the privilege that I got to do these things and feel like a mom again, that I wanted to do them every chance I got. Sure there was a little tweaking here and there, but these big in the moment things to me eventually became the “normal” thing to do. I was doing “normal” mom things again (with a few alterations of course) and it felt good. Really good.

But back to my point of why I am so lucky my son was so young when this happened. It’s because he doesn’t even remember the “new normal” phase. He literally does not think there is anything different about his life just because his mom is down a leg. It’s “normal” to him. Sure he realizes his mom has one leg and most other moms have two but that’s what makes this situation beautiful to me. Not only does he know I can and will do anything for him, but he has no problem helping people understand his normal. He answers questions from other kids as they come but otherwise he is a typical 4 year old boy who is just out there playing his heart out. And the same goes for my girls. They have never had a mom with 2 legs. And they know they don’t need a mom with two legs because they have me. Their one legged mommy. Though sometimes I feel like they had to grow up and help out a bit more than most kids their ages, my situation has never hindered their childhood and I’ll forever be thankful about that. But not only did that happen because God has blessed me with determination and motivation before and now, but He has given me the best family and friends with patience and support to help me during the “New normal” to “normal” transition phase. “New normal” does not last forever. Eventually it will become “normal”. And each part of your day and each task you do will go through those phases, but once it gets there, man is it satisfying.

So why am I writing this big long post? It’s to ask you what is “normal”? There is no cookie cutter for it. There is no box that it’ll fit into. It’s something that is personalized just for you and your family. It might be “weird” or “different” to people who are passing by or people who are on the outside looking in. But that’s just it. They are never in your shoes and chances are if they were, your “weird””normal” wouldn’t be weird at all because they would know why you do things the way you do and chances are they’d be doing the same thing. Never be ashamed of your “normal” whether it’s new or not. Because it helps you, be you. “New Normal” is hard. And though it is necessary sometimes, don’t go through it unless you have to or want to. Embrace your “normal” because it is something we all want/have though no ones is EVER going to be the same. “Normal”. Shoot for it because it’s what makes you different.

#TheOneLeggedMommy #Normal #NewNormal #AmpStrong #Amputee #NecrotizingFasciitis #HipDisarticulation #SoLucky #Blessed #SundayThoughts